[font="times new roman"]Such as every kid, I went through a very awkward stage in middle school. I was tall, unfashionable, acne ridden, and liked school, which was very un-cool at my age. Even though I tried so hard and was nice to everyone, I just really didn’t fit in. I trudged through school everyday admiring the “popular” crew and wishing I could be one of them. But even though I was not popular I had a few friends that were on the fringes of that crowd and I envied the attention they received from boys, the same boys who would mercilessly tease me in class. I worried constantly over what they had that I did not. Was it money, clothes, or did they just have some natural gene built in that made them so cool? I soon realized that even though, yes these things did matter, all of them were also thin. They had beautiful petite bodies contrasting my tall frame and wide hips. I thought that if I was as skinny as they were, that maybe I wouldn’t be teased as much and soon people would like me too. [/font]
[font="times new roman"]So at the beginning of my eighth grade year, I began a strict diet plan, which at first began as pretty normal and healthy. But I didn’t see any immediate results and I quickly grew impatient. I wanted to be popular now! I then started to starve myself, eating barely enough around others so they wouldn’t question me. I avoided food at all costs, and it soon escalated so that if I had to eat anything with any amount of fat in it, I would compel myself to throw it up so I wouldn’t feel guilty. As horrible as this was, I finally began to notice that I was losing weight! My “diet” was working! People even began to comment on how skinny I was! I loved it! This newfound weight loss only fueled my ambitions and I kept eating less and less, to the point where finally my parents and friends started to notice how really unhealthy I was starting to look. My collarbones and hips were practically jutting at of my skin, and my faced looked hallow, but I didn’t care, I was finally tiny like the other girls, and I was getting all this attention, even if some of it was negative.[/font]
[font="times new roman"]My family really began to worry and my parents finally confronted me about it. My mom took me to the doctor who forced me on a scale. I was at a 100 pounds and was 5’6” tall, which was very abnormal for a girl my height. My doctor talked to me about eating disorders, and before that I honestly thought I didn’t have one. I thought I was just dieting like the women in all my magazines. Even then I still kept up my fanatical starvation plan, until one day I made myself throw up an apple. An apple! I finally realized how bad I was so that I was now throwing up fruit! I knew that I had to stop.[/font]
That summer, before I entered ninth grade, my father made me eat three square meals a day, with fat in them. That was the best thing that ever happened to me. I put on weight and I began to look like my old self again. I was never completely happy gaining weight, and it’s only been till recently that I have finally become comfortable with my body. It has taken a long time for me to recover from that awful obsession and I will never fully be the same. I will always have that little voice in the back of my head tempting me to return to my old ways, but I have learned to ignore it, just like every girl should. No one should feel so bad about themselves that they want to harm their bodies in any way. If I could give advice to young girls of the world, I would tell them no matter what love your life, love your body, and love yourself.