I met him out of pure coincidence; I met him because he was a friend of my boyfriend at the time. I met him and we became friends, the best of friends that’s also around the time I fell in love with him…we fell in love. And I left my boyfriend for him, to have a real love with the man I truly loved. But, now things have fallen apart we’re now on different paths headed in different directions. In some way I honestly believe I deserve this, this heartache because I caused someone else heartache. I left someone to be with someone else so I know I deserve this to lose the man I love. We are now no longer together, it’s over between us…and...I honestly don’t know why. I still don’t understand why, I want to understand... We we’re so happy together even with all the mistakes I made he proved to me that he would always be by my side. No matter the stupidity I said did he stood by and showed me how much he loved me.
Then one day after our five months together, he said…said it was over between us and he stopped loving me. But for some reason I didn't believe him, at first I thought that it was just me holding onto a shred of our love that wasn't really there anymore. I don’t know any more I keep trying to forget, to move and selfishly be with someone else whether or not my feelings remain. The truth of the matter is that my love for him is still strong; I would have never stayed by his side if I didn't believe in him. I loved him, I love him still love him with all my heart I love him like the first day I met him.
I have to write everything, everything I’m feeling everything that I’m going through, all the feelings and emotions but especially the heartache. I want to believe he still loves me; I’m an idiot for believing it myself. Every time I make a fool out of myself saying, “I still love you, even if you don’t love me anymore.” And I always get the same response from him, “I just can’t.” It never makes sense to me; the thing I hate most is that he apologized to me; he said he was sorry but does he honestly think that changes anything? Does it heal my broken heart?
I don’t what I’m going to do but I guess I will focus on something else. No matter how hard I try to think about anything else and not see him but everyday it’s the same thing being forced to see him. We don’t speak to one another just a meaningless glance every now and then we have no relationship, not friends we’re nothing now but then again its better this way. I wish my story had a happy ending right now but life isn't a fairy tale. I know in my heart though one day, one day I will have my happy ending in love. My happily every after.
> Not my best work but hey reality isn't always the best especially not my writing. hehe..
By: Kelsey Amparo Garza aka "Misa-chan c:"