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Mother gone over bored on scholarships?
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wheelmon
#1 Posted : Wednesday, September 12, 2012 11:39:19 PM(UTC)
wheelmon

Rank: New Next Stepper

Joined: 9/12/2012(UTC)
Posts: 1
Just recently, my mom has gone way over-board on the thought of getting scholarships. She wants me to apply to all of the ones i can, but she is so excited about this, im actually having trouble going to school, as in i cant get out the door because I "have to finish filling out this scholarship first." Even though I know this is something that I should be doing anyways, it's interfering with all sorts of my activities. It is my senior year and I already am apart of things, sports, after-school drama, etc... but even when I come home at 8 at night, I dont get time to relax because I need to find more scholarships to fill out. It just seems like enough isn't enough, how do I make her happy?

Also, she wants me to go to a 4-year school, but she also is telling me to go to a Career and Technical school for the skill needed to get a job. I cant do both, and I doubt ill be able to afford both, what option would be best? Should I go to a job with a B.A. in something, or a a certificate saying I have the skill to do the job. Im at a lose as to what to do.

Thanks for the help.
-wheelmon
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InternLaura
#2 Posted : Friday, October 05, 2012 9:19:21 AM(UTC)
InternLaura

Rank: Starting Next Stepper

Joined: 1/16/2012(UTC)
Posts: 9
There can be few things harder to deal with than an over-bearing mom. (I'm an only child so i experience this on a pretty much daily basis.) Clearly she wants the best for you and it's great that you want to make her happy but at one some point it goes beyond being helpful and instead makes you feel overwhelmed.

I'm sure that is not her goal. However, if you haven't expressed this to her, how is she going to know that she's being less helpful and is actually causing you to be confused about your future? If you haven't said anything, you should. Don't blame her, just tell her that you are thinking about your future, but it's not an easy thing to do with her contant pressure on you. It doesn't allow you to make decisions that are best for you and you're not taking the time to think about what you really want, what you can afford and what you're interested in if the only thing you can think about is what to do to please your mom.

Yes, it is important for you to apply to scholarships and apply to them early. But it doesn't have to be a process you do all on your own. Ask your counselor for help - he or she can refer you to ones you have the best shot at getting and will probably offer you a recommendation as well. Maybe having a plan will make your mom less concerned about what you are doing on this front.

Finally, as far as what you want to pursue, a career or technical school isn't necessarily better in developing a skill unless you are absolutely certain of what you want to do. What's the point of learning how to program computers, for example, if when you complete your degree you decide you actually want to work in a laboratory? If you know what you want to do then it's a great idea to do a 2 by 2 program by earning your associates and finishing up at a four-year school or just stopping there and starting a career. The most important thing you have to do for yourself is go somewhere that you think you can learn and grow and become the person you want to be. You have to remind your mom that thinking big-picture is far more important than one little scholarship if it's preventing you from getting done what you need to.

I hope this has been some help and I wish you the best of luck!

-Laura
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