The Lonely Shadow
Tony sat with his hands gripping the steering wheel of his truck. Tapping his fingers nervously, he stared blankly through the window watching other kids walk up the school steps together. After letting out a heavy sigh, Tony slowly grabbed his backpack and opened his door.
“Here we go,” he said to himself. As Tony approached this relatively new place, he began to consider all of the exciting things his new community had continued to offer. The neighborhood in which his family had recently moved into surrounded him with a seemingly friendly group of neighbors. His new house was bigger than his last one, which of course, Tony saw as a major plus. His thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of shouting.
“Watch out, man!” some boys hollered from the Jeep they were riding in. Caught off guard, Tony swiftly shuffled out of the way of the honking vehicle. His pace slowed as he stared through squinted eyes at the wild group in the truck. An uncomfortable sensation shadowed his mind with a distant memory. Something bothered him as he neared the school steps and a few kind students greeted him. Before Tony could put his finger on it, an excited voice spoke over the school intercom:
“Welcome back from summer break students! I, Principal Glover, along with the rest of the school staff, would like to wish you a great school year and encourage you to be involved in the variety of clubs, sports, and organizations offered here at Hayward High. Go Panthers!” Now, Tony was walking into the school. Holding the door open for a girl he saw not too far behind him, he smiled. She smiled back before asking, “Hey, you’re the new boy. Uh, Thomas, right?”
“Nope. He doesn’t go here,” chuckled Tony as he joked. “But I do. Name’s Tony.”
“Oh my gosh! My mistake. My name’s Kennedy,” said the girl as she swept her hair behind her ear. “I think I live down the street from you.”
“Yeah, I thought you looked familiar. Are you a junior, too?”
“Of course,” Kennedy smirked. “And welcome, welcome, welcome! I hope you like it here. Thinking of joining any sports? You look like a football guy.”
Startled, Tony cleared his throat and answered quickly, “Nah, I played last year…” He looked down and pretended to adjust his collar. “I’m gonna focus mainly on academics this year. You know, grades come first.”
“That’s a smart move. I could never drop volley ball,” Kennedy confessed. “Well, look, I’ll catch you later. Gotta go to the student council meeting. Maybe we’ll have a class or two together?”
“Maybe! And alright. See you around.”
Now, Tony was alone. Feeling out of place, he awkwardly stepped to the right to avoid a collision with a group of girls walking in his direction. Tony noticed that his shoe was untied and slid his backpack off of his shoulder onto the floor next to him. As he tied his shoes, he felt that bothersome sensation rise up his spine. He began to hear hushed voices and smothered laughter around him. A haunting memory replayed in his mind: fingers pointing at him and kids calling him names. Everywhere Tony looked, judgmental faces stared back. Suddenly, the bell rang for kids to report to their classes, breaking Tony from his trance. He pulled his schedule from his back pocket, unfolded it, and searched for room 114.
Walking into the room, Tony found his seating choices limited and sat in the seat closest to the window. An approaching commotion filled the hallway and entered the classroom. Tony watched shortly as the group of boys who had been in the Jeep before greeted fellow students. Their conversation slowed as one of the boys called the others over to tell them something.
“That’s the kid.” Tony heard a rather familiar voice whisper. His heart beat doubled as déjà vu crept over him once more. Tony’s mind filled with confusion: “Who me? They can’t be talking about me…I don’t even know them.” But in the back of his mind, Tony knew the impossible could be true. Anything could happen in high school. Tony caught bits and pieces of the conversation across the room during class: “…homeschooled…last year…no friends…he’s gay…”
The move had changed nothing. All of his family’s efforts had been in vain. A new car or a new wardrobe couldn’t change how people would look at Tony. That boy – the one who called all the other boys to gather round and listen - Tony remembered from the end of his freshman year. His constant berating and callous name-calling had been part of the reason Tony had to leave school. The bullying had caused far too much stress and resulted in Tony’s mental break down. Now, here Tony was, looking out the window at a sunny scene, pretending not to hear the gossip just behind him. He knew that no matter how perfect the weather would be, he would always stand in that same lonely shadow.